Okay, allow me to explain.

It’s day two of the draft. I’m functioning on roughly four hours of sleep the night before and approximately 20 for the previous six days. The Broncos have just picked Marcus Thomas; I’ve just completed a hastily-written piece focusing on the mea culpas he offered for his dismissal from the University of Florida during a fairly extensive and cathartic Scouting Combine press conference two months prior.

At this point, photographer Brett Wilhelm — who has constructed an elaborate, studio-style setup from which to shoot stills of the first-day draft picks — asks if I can stand in so he can get an idea of what the photos will look like. Despite being a good 12 inches shorter than the draftees, I agree and proceed to start hamming it up in my punch-drunk, exhausted state.

What resulted is the photo you see in the top right. But you’re not getting the full effect of that picture up in the top right with the crop that was made.

Below is the full shot, and the iconic portrait to which it was immediately compared:

Nevertheless, upon hearing the comparison I, as a devout Seinfeld fan, start spewing the art patrons’ opinion of the painting and the hipster-doofus subject therein:

ART PATRON NO. 1: “His struggle is man’s struggle. He lifts my spirit.”
ART PATRON NO. 2: “He is a loathsome, offensive brute, yet I can’t look away.”
ART PATRON NO. 1: “He transcends time and space.”
ART PATRON NO. 2: “He sickens me.”
ART PATRON NO. 1: “I love it.”
ART PATRON NO. 2: “Me, too.”

So I was eventually cajoled into placing the picture on the top right corner of the blog. What the heck, right? It’s just a silly little photo, although sometimes I think this one from my BroncosCountry.com profile — which was mostly designed at sp-studio.de, if you’d like to go make one yourself — is more accurate:

Tags: Seinfeld, Self-Indulgence, Stuff That's Totally Irrelevant

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